An Unexpected Arrangement Page 11

  Then he deepened the kiss and she responded, pressing her palm against his chest. His fingertips skimmed her jaw as he cupped her cheek in his hand. Her head spun. His touch was firm, yet tender, making her breath shallow. She hadn’t felt this way about a kiss in ages. Not even her ex-boyfriend Zeke had made her feel like this.

  His kisses had provoked amazing reactions, too. Until he proved she couldn’t trust him. And she’d already followed him all the way to Montana. There she was, more than a thousand miles from home and brokenhearted. Panic rising, she pushed against Jack’s chest.

  She couldn’t do this. Not now. And not with Jack. Less than two weeks. That was all she had left. Ten more days with Macey and Charlotte, then she’d leave for volleyball camp and someone else would step into her role. Thinking about it shredded her, but for the sake of her heart, she’d pretend his kisses didn’t melt her into a puddle. Pretend she hadn’t fallen in love with Jack. Pretend she could live without the twins and Jack in her life.

  * * *

  The sweet taste of Laramie’s kiss lingered. He could still feel the softness of her skin under his fingertips, even though she’d scooted across the blanket already.

  “I’m sorry.” She pressed her hand to her mouth. Was her body still humming from their kiss, too?

  “We shouldn’t... I mean, that was... That shouldn’t have happened.”

  Jack flinched. So not what he wanted to hear.

  She stood quickly and brushed her hands across her skirt. “I’m your nanny, we’ve been friends for years, and now I—”

  “Laramie, please don’t.”

  She started loading the picnic basket. “Don’t what?”

  “Act like that was a mistake.”

  She grew still, her bottle of water in hand. “It was a mistake, Jack.”

  He stifled a groan and tipped his head back. He’d made a lot of mistakes in his life, but kissing Laramie was not one of them. The fireworks, the romantic picnic for two, a babysitter for Macey and Charlotte. He thought he’d planned the perfect evening, but based on the way she was avoiding eye contact and packing up like a rabid dog was chasing her, she clearly regretted kissing him.

  “I’m supposed to be your friend and here I am leaning in for a kiss and letting you woo me with strawberries and chocolate.” The last of the fireworks fizzled and popped in the sky and the silver light gave him a painful glimpse of the confusion on her face. “I mean, you don’t even want to live here. I only agreed to help with the girls because you said you were desperate, and now things are going to be all weird.”

  “All right, all right.” He stood and held up both palms, surrendering as she walked their relationship back to the dreaded friend zone. “I get it. Message delivered.”

  He wasn’t sorry they’d kissed, but he couldn’t handle her trampling all over his wounded heart with her list of reasons why a relationship would never work. Even though he’d never forget the warmth of her lips against his, or the way it felt to finally hold her in his arms, he’d accept her boundaries, because he hated the thought of losing her friendship.

  “C’mon, I’ll drive you home.” He took the picnic basket from her. “My truck’s parked on the other side of the church.”

  “I—I’ll get a ride with my parents.” She glanced around, then reached for her phone. “They’re probably still here somewhere.”

  Ouch. Jack winced. She’d rather ride home with her folks? At least she was honest. While her rejection was like the proverbial salt in a wound, he’d rather know the truth now. She couldn’t wait to get away from him and she wasn’t interested in a relationship.

  “Remember, I’m not coming by tomorrow because I need to help my family finish with harvest.” She finally met his gaze. “I’ll see you the day after?”

  He swallowed hard. “Right. Yeah, see you.”

  Laramie offered an awkward wave, then turned and worked her way through the crowd lingering on the lawn. He stood there alone, holding the basket and the quilt, and watched her go, hoping she’d turn around. Or even better, come back and tell him she’d—

  Jacked huffed out a breath and shook his head as Laramie stopped and spoke to Cooper. He was a fool for even letting himself imagine she’d change her mind. What did he expect her to say? That the kiss was amazing and nothing about tonight was a mistake? She’d start packing tomorrow and look for a job in Utah, too?

  Laramie smiled at Cooper, and Jack turned away. She didn’t want him. Shocker. He was used to people he cared about not wanting him around.

  * * *

  Laramie was up with the sun, sitting on her back porch with a steaming mug of coffee while Trixie romped around the yard with her puppy. The same one Jack had assured her he wanted, but conveniently hadn’t claimed. Honestly the puppy’s status was the least of her worries about Jack now.

  He’d kissed her.

  After all these years of waiting and dreaming and hoping Jack would look at her as anything more than his sister’s best friend, he’d finally kissed her.

  And she’d kissed him back.

  Even though she’d declared their first kiss a mistake, her heart blip-blipped into a spontaneous two-step as her mind replayed every delicious detail. She’d enjoyed the sensation of Jack’s lips on hers. And that was a problem. Jack didn’t want to stay in Merritt’s Crossing, and she couldn’t possibly leave. Not now. Not when her grandfather’s dementia was progressing, and her family hadn’t found an affordable place for him to live.

  Trixie dropped a cloth Frisbee at her feet and backed up, her tail wagging, as she waited for Laramie to start another round of fetch. Laramie put her mug down on the side table and then flung the Frisbee across the yard. Trixie and the puppy raced away, barking. Dew glistened on the grass and the sun cast its early-morning rays through the trees lining her back fence.

  What would Macey and Charlotte think about the dogs? They were a little young now, but having pets could be fun for them once they were able to run around in the yard. Except they’d be more than eight hours away in Utah. A hollow ache filled Laramie’s chest at the thought of not being with them anymore. She couldn’t fathom all the ways they’d grow and change over the next several months. By the time Jack came back for a visit, the twins would probably both be walking.

  Even though she’d grown attached to the baby girls, she couldn’t trust her heart to Jack when she’d seen the outcome of his impulsive behavior. Sure, the girls were a blessing, but he was still so wounded and broken over the loss of his father and uncle. His fear of commitment was intense, and it terrified her. If she followed him to Utah and he decided he couldn’t handle a serious relationship, she’d be stuck in an unfamiliar place, nursing a broken heart. Again. And those sweet babies didn’t deserve to be caught in the middle. They’d been through so much already.

  Trixie returned and dropped the Frisbee on the deck. Her pink tongue lolling, she pranced around, anticipating Laramie’s next throw. The puppy nipped at his mother’s heels and scampered in circles.

  Laramie chuckled. “I have time for one more throw.”

  She tossed the toy again, then stood and reached for her coffee. Today was supposed to be the last day of wheat harvest and she’d promised her parents and her grandmother she’d help feed the workers lunch and dinner.

  A few minutes later, she’d settled the dogs with plenty of food and water, tucked her ponytail in a baseball cap, then quickly fixed another cup of coffee to go. She faced a long day ahead and the lack of sleep after an emotional evening weighed her down. Massaging the knotted muscles in her neck and shoulders provided little relief, but she wasn’t about to back out on her family during their busiest season of the year.

  Laramie got in her car, tucked her phone and her insulated mug in the cupholders, then drove toward the farm. Her thoughts drifted to Jack and the twins. How did he plan to spend the day? Had he hired another babysitter again or wa
s he on his own?

  Stop. She battled back the mental images of Jack smiling as he sat on his living room floor with Charlotte and Macey babbling while they gnawed on their favorite toys. Laramie jabbed at the button on her console and quickly selected a radio station. It wasn’t her favorite song, but the upbeat tempo and lyrics might distract her.

  Her phone buzzed with an incoming call. Laramie’s breath caught. She hoped it was Jack. Instead, her brother’s name and number filled the screen.

  “No, thank you.” She turned the radio up louder. “It’s dangerous to talk and drive.”

  Guilt twisted her insides. Answering her phone while driving wasn’t illegal, but her students weren’t allowed to, and she lectured them on the dangers of distracted driving all the time. Wasn’t she supposed to set a positive example?

  Except she had the capability to answer his call hands-free. And intentionally avoiding Landon wasn’t right, either.

  He’d made a point of speaking to her after the parade and she’d hugged him, but part of her still hoped he’d gone back to Texas or Oklahoma or wherever bull riding took him next. Because if Landon hung around long enough, he’d convince her parents to make a questionable decision.

  When Laramie turned down the long dirt driveway toward her family’s farm, sunlight glinted off the chrome bumper of Landon’s large white pickup parked in front of the farmhouse.

  She groaned. “Seriously?”

  Lord, please help me to be patient and loving. He is my brother, after all.

  Another wave of guilt crested as she parked her car next to Landon’s truck. Prayer hadn’t been a priority in her life lately. Too busy trying to help everyone and force circumstances to bend to her will.

  She sighed, grabbed her phone and her coffee, and then exited the car.

  “Good morning.” The storm door slammed behind him as Landon came out of the house.

  “Hey.” Laramie met him at the bottom of the wide porch steps. “I didn’t realize you were still here.”

  Landon’s sleepy smile dimmed. “You can’t get rid of me that easy, sis.”

  “Are you driving the combine?”

  “Yep.” Landon wore faded jeans and an old Merritt’s Crossing High School Basketball T-shirt, and his damp blond hair curled around his ears. He held a water bottle and a baseball cap in his hands. Laramie scanned his face, noting the fatigue etching his features.

  “I’m sure Dad needs you to get started, but maybe at lunch we could talk about Grandpa?” Laramie lowered her voice. “He needs to move to a memory care facility, but the closest place with availability is in Denver, and it’s too expensive.”

  Landon palmed the back of his neck. “I wish I could help.”

  “That sounds like you can’t.” She tried not to sound aggravated. Wasn’t he a champion bull rider? “What happened to all the prize money you’ve won?”

  He hesitated, avoiding her gaze as he carved the toe of his boot through the dirt. “I’m broke.”

  Of course he was. Her parents had put everything into her brother, and he’d squandered it. Another affirmation that she couldn’t trust men to be responsible.

  * * *

  A day without Laramie moved slower than a traffic jam on the interstate.

  Everywhere he turned in his house, from the baby clothes neatly stacked in the girls’ dresser drawers to the pots and pans arranged in his kitchen cabinets, reminders of her infiltrated his thoughts. Her absence prompted a restlessness he couldn’t shake.

  Jack sighed and flopped on the sofa. Macey and Charlotte were in the middle of a long afternoon nap. He’d tossed another load of laundry in the washer, defrosted some chicken for dinner and picked up the toys off the floor. The minutes crept by. He grabbed the remote control, turned on the TV and wandered through the channels. Not that he’d be able to focus on a show. His mind promptly circled back to Laramie and the kiss they’d shared during the fireworks.

  He flung his arm over his eyes, determined to block out the barrage of images that memory provoked. The smoothness of her cheek against his fingertips, the sweet taste of her soft lips moving against his. Her touch had silenced his doubts. Snuffed out the worry about his future and made him believe, just for a second, that he could do anything. Even stay in Merritt’s Crossing if that meant building a life with her.

  Then she’d trampled his hopes when she’d panicked and pushed him away.

  She’d rejected him. The truth slammed into him again, like a hammer smashing his thumb when he’d missed hitting a nail.

  His phone pinged and he sat up, grateful for a distraction. Part of him hoped the text was from her. He traded the remote for his phone and scanned the group text message. An ache settled in his gut. Laramie wasn’t involved in Emily’s last-minute plans for a cookout. While Jack noted Cooper’s name and a handful of other friends included in the invitation, he wasn’t interested. He dropped the phone on the cushion without responding.

  He didn’t want to take the girls out with his friends. None of them had kids yet. Talk about awkward. They’d get to sit around on Emily’s deck and relax, while he’d wear himself out keeping Macey and Charlotte happy. Besides, someone would likely ask about him and Laramie and he’d have to sidestep their questions. No, thank you.

  Back in the day, he would’ve been the first to show up at a spontaneous get-together and probably the last to leave. Not tonight. He had to think about what was best for Macey and Charlotte. And selfishly, he needed to shield his wounded heart.

  Determined to spend the last few minutes of the girls’ nap time on something productive, he reached for his phone again. The woman who’d looked after the girls while he’d gone to the Fourth of July festival had offered to babysit anytime. She seemed confident and content managing twins. While she didn’t put the dishes away or fold any laundry, Jack was impressed with her immediate warmth and attentiveness toward Macey and Charlotte.

  He needed to find reliable childcare. Quickly. Laramie had to leave for volleyball camp soon. Too soon. Dread pitted his stomach. He pushed the feeling aside, sent the woman a message inquiring about her availability, then started the next episode of a home renovation show.

  Laramie didn’t want him, so it was time to move on.

  Chapter Ten

  The next morning, Laramie washed the bottles, plastic spoons and bowls from breakfast, then set them in the drying rack on Jack’s kitchen counter. The muffled sound of Jack’s voice on the phone in his office sent anxiety rippling through her. Not that she didn’t enjoy having him close by. That was the problem. She enjoyed being around him too much. And it was all coming to an end. The snippets of conversation filtering into the room hinted he was interviewing for a job.

  She left the kitchen, searching for another task or chore to complete while Macey and Charlotte napped. Eavesdropping was wrong. What Jack did with his life was really none of her business. She was the one who’d declared their kiss a mistake. And she’d told him from the beginning that he was foolish for moving away, especially now that he had two children to consider.

  But it sounded like Jack wasn’t interested in listening to her advice.

  He’d made his decision and now they were at a stalemate. She wasn’t uprooting her entire life to move to Utah. No matter how much she cared about Macey, Charlotte and Jack. Or how often she thought about that kiss. Her skin tingled with the memory of Jack’s touch. But kissing him had been a lousy, impulsive choice, and that was the kind of behavior that only led to heartache.

  She approached the unfolded laundry sitting in Jack’s living room. All she had to do was stay focused on caring for Macey and Charlotte for eight more days and then they’d be at the end of their agreement. He’d have to find a new nanny because she was taking her team to volleyball camp. Her stomach cinched in a tighter knot. For the first time in ten years, she wasn’t looking forward to going to camp. The bonding, camara
derie, friendly competition against other teams—even the boisterous atmosphere in the van on the drive to the university—usually made the trip the highlight of her summer.

  Until she started spending her days holding the world’s cutest babies. She sat down on the sofa and plucked a white onesie with navy-blue stars from the pile of clean laundry. She held it up. Baby girl clothes were so adorable. She folded the onesie and set it on the coffee table, trying hard not to think about how domestic this whole scenario was. Jack at work in his home office, the babies taking their morning naps, a pile of clean clothes to fold while the sweet scent of fabric softener enveloped her.

  Her phone rang, rescuing her from the painful realization that her days playing house with Jack were numbered. She pulled her phone from her jeans pocket. Grandma’s name and number filled the screen.

  Oh no. Laramie’s heart raced as she accepted the call. “Grandma?”

  “Hi, sweetie.” Grandma sounded stressed.

  “Everything okay?”

  “Not exactly. I have a doctor’s appointment in Limon at eleven o’clock. Landon said he’d stay with your grandfather, but he isn’t here yet.”

  Shocker. Laramie squeezed her eyes shut. “Do you need me to come and stay with him?”

  “Well, I need somebody. If I don’t leave soon, I’m going to be late.”

  Laramie glanced over her shoulder toward Jack’s office. The twins would probably wake up soon. Jack mentioned earlier he had a lot going on with work and spending an hour in an interview was putting him behind. If she left for a couple of hours, he’d struggle to feed the girls their lunch and get his work done.

  “Laramie, are you still there?”

  “Yes, Grandma. I’m here.” She strode toward the door. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”